Never been much of a girly girl...

.....some might just say I'm a "late bloomer"  (isn't that an unsettling term?)

So I've been having trouble falling asleep lately.  I'm not sure what's causing it exactly.  Maybe it's that I'm not exhausting myself enough during the day, maybe it's that I can't shut off my brain thinking of all the things I want to get done in the next year.  Whatever the issue is, it's annoying!

Last night I started thinking of all the "girly" things that a "tom-boy" (another weird term... maybe I need to do some research to find out where these sayings come from...) like myself just never got into.  Sounds odd to blog about, but I got a kick out of it and I think that those who really know me will too.

For example,
When I was a kid, I absolutely hated my hair done in curls
I chopped my hair boy-short when I was 13
I don't like bows or poofy dresses
I like simple jewelry, not big and bulky bling
Pink was never my favorite color
I don't really like shopping, especially at a mall
I've only bought 3 purses my whole life, spending no more than $15 on one
I hate looking through magazines
I own 1 belt
I've never had fake nails
I've never had a professional pedicure
I don't like drama
On average I shave my legs about once a week
I didn't even try tampons until I was 19
I didn't wear mascara until I was 23
I don't care much for flowers and didn't request them at my wedding (didn't have a bouquet)
You will never find me wearing heels with jeans
I didn't care much for chocolate, until I got pregnant
I'm messy and I eat junk food

Although funny I'm sure, I guess what I'm hoping to get out of this is reminding myself that I am unique.  I am who I am and I've always been the same person.  I learn and grow, in my own way.  Yes life is hard, but I am finding comfort in the fact that I can rely on myself.  I know what I stand for and that will never change.  I'm happy to have people who love me and who I love enough to feel their pain.  Plus, it never hurts to count your blessings, as simple as they may be!

And just a reassurance for anyone wondering about my girlishness,

I own more than 10 pairs of shoes
I enjoy girl talk
I'm really not good at any sport
I don't know squat about cars
I like to decorate, organize, and plan
I'm never satisfied with my appearance
I like nail polish and some accessories
I have a Victoria's Secret credit card
I'm married to a boy!
Plus, I'm a beautician! 

Inadequate

Life is hard.  Life does not turn out the way you thought it would, hoped it would, try to make it.  I posted  a long time ago about so many close to me having too hard of trials.  Well, most things haven't gotten any better.  In fact, the more time that passes, the more I'm convinced bad things continue to happen and most likely get worse.  I'm terrified to raise children in this dangerous world.  I don't want to do it!  There is a lot of goodness, and I try to stay focused on that.  I try to stick close to religion because it's one constant that brings me peace of mind and comfort.  But sometimes it too can be overwhelming.  Can we not receive maximum blessings if we aren't living as perfectly as we're suppose to?  I don't know.  I can't believe that, but is that what I've been told to believe?  Regardless, there are countless times that I just feel inadequate, in every sense of the word.  I think we've suffered enough and the world is wicked enough that we've earned Christ's second coming. Sorry for the rant, sometimes a girl's just gotta vent!