Ezekiel's birth story

I'm so proud to announce the birth of my beautiful son, Ezekiel Jonah Lewis.  He was born on December 18, 2012 at 2:57 pm.  Weighing 9 lbs, 3 oz and 21 1/4 inches long.  He is a big boy!

So, here's the whole story.  I was due on Wednesday, December 12th and not much happened that day.  Not much happened for the next 5 days.  Finally, on Monday I had a Doctor's appointment.  I was more than ready to be done but unfortunately he told me they don't like to induce labor until you are 41 weeks.  I was 40 weeks and 5 days.  But he said we could go ahead and schedule it for the next day since I was so close. He was a sweet man and John and I both liked him a lot.  He also told us he was the Doctor on call that day, so we knew he'd be the one to deliver our son.  Which we were cool with.  To help me along, he stripped my membrane again.  He said I could expect a call around 6 am and they would tell me when to come in and have the baby.  That night I had random contractions and got very little sleep.  At 5:39 am I got the call.  We quickly got ready and headed over to the hospital.   We checked in and settled into the birthing room.  I immediately liked my nurse!  She was super encouraging and comforting and kind.  I was at 4 and started the pitocin around 7 am.  The contractions began almost immediately and going about every 4 minutes.  In half an hour they were about every 2 minutes.  After an hour I was up to a 6.  I got my epidural around 9 am.  I was feeling strong and that I could go longer without it but my nurse convinced me to go ahead and do it sooner than later.  Why suffer right?  I was progressing so fast that I think she was nervous I would wait too long then not be able to get one.  I'm glad I got it when I did, it was a lot nicer being   numbed!  Shortly after the epidural my water broke.  They checked me again and I was at a 7.  It was about 10 am now.  An hour later I was at a 9 1/2 and they said I should be able to start pushing soon.  Like I said, I was moving fast.  I basically went from a 4 to a 10 in about 5 hours.  I was feeling pretty lucky and confident for how well it was going.  I thought for sure he'd just pop right out.  However, that did not happen.  I started pushing but was so numb that I didn't really know where or how to push.  I couldn't even hold up my right leg because it was completely numb.  I had some feeling in my left leg but for about an hour I couldn't feel anything so they turned off my epidural to help me get some feeling back.  It worked a little.  I had been pushing for about an hour and a half and not progressing.  The baby was not making his way down and they started talking about what would happen if he never came down.  After 2 hours they started talking C-section.  They typically don't let women push more than 2 hours because it exhausts them so much and usually the baby's heart beat starts dropping.  I was not happy to hear that because here I was after 2 hours of pushing and the thought of being cut open after all that work was killing me.  It actually gave me the courage to keep going.  The doctor said I could keep pushing as long as I had the energy and the baby's heartbeat was doing well.  Thankfully it was.  My little champ had a perfect heart beat the whole time!  My nurse said that he was what was saving me from having to get a C-section.  I knew he was strong!  She then had me lay on my side and push from another angle, thinking that would move me along.  It was helping a little.  He was finally coming down but still not as far as they wanted.  The Doctor came back and asked me if I was ok having forceps used.  At this point, 3 hours of pushing, I gladly agreed.  Anything to help him get out.  My baby was also turned up so the Doctor used the forceps to pull him down as well as turn him.  He didn't want to try to turn him too much in case of lapsing the chord.  So I felt a big difference once his head had been brought down and I pushed my very hardest after that to get him out and be done!  I felt the head come out and my husband looked at me and confirmed that I was almost done, just one more big push was all I had left to muster.  I gave it my all and felt his shoulders come out and the rest of him slide out easy.  I had done it!  I looked at my husband, who was pushing back some tears, and knew a little miracle had just happened.  The moment was priceless!  (plus I have never seen John cry)  Everyone started commenting on how big the baby appeared to be.  The Doctor stated that the baby had a true knot in his chord too.  This kid had so many things going against him but he remained strong and got through it.  They took the baby over to the little table and did his Apgar test and wiped him up, weighed him, and all that stuff then finally brought him to me.  He was big and I just looked at him in awe, I couldn't believe this was really happening.  They didn't let me have him long because he had some slight irregular breathing and needed to take him to the NICU.  He was doing fine but really grunting.  They explained that some of the air pockets in his lungs were most likely just not opening as much as they should so they would need to give him oxygen for an hour or two and then all should be fine.  John went with him and I layed there while the Doc cleaned me up and stitched me.  It was taking a while and finally they told me I had an episiotomy as well as a big tear.  I figured I did because he was such a big baby.  So they finally got me moved to the recovery room and John was in and out checking on our son and then reporting back to me.  It took about 4 and a half hours before they brought him to me.  Once they did however, I was overwhelmed with emotion.  They put him on my chest for skin to skin time and I just cried and cried.  He felt so wonderful and warm.  The next few hours are sorta a blur with all the holding him, feeding him, trying to sleep, eat, everything was sorta smushed together.  The next day was better, although I was so exhausted that night that I didn't really sleep at all.  All my muscles ached from pushing.  But I got up a few times that day, showered, took a nap, hung out with baby and some family and just recovered.  The day flew by.  I slept better that night and woke the next day shocked that I'd be going home in a few hours.  I wanted to stay longer.  It's nice having your meals brought to you and to have other people do just about everything for you.  But by the time we had to go, I was ready to be home.  The time is still flying by and I'm learning a little bit better every day just how to take care of this little life.  It's exhausting but I totally love it!  I mean, look at this little guy, how can you not love him?

The time has come

  I wasn't planning on blogging again until the baby was born but here I am almost a week late with way too much time on my hands. John suggested I blog and write out what I'm feeling and although I wasn't going to, I'm kinda glad I am. It's Monday night and I am 5 days over my due date. These 5 days have been some of the longest days of my life. This whole pregnancy has felt long but this last week was definitely the worse.
  On Wednesday, my due date, I was anxious and trying all the "home remedies" to get my labor started. John had finished out the semester and our bags were packed, the house was clean and everything was ready. I started out a little excited because I was experiencing some braxton hicks but they never became more intense or frequent. The hours flew by and I was beginning to realize that my son would not be born on this oh-so-awesome of days. By the time I finally made it to bed I just knew he wasn't coming in the next few days either. I tried to deny it but I knew I shouldn't get my hopes up either. They told me at one of my doctor appointments that they won't let me go past 41 weeks, so I knew the 19th would be my last day for sure. It was feeling like a very long ways away. So, Thursday, Friday, and Saturday dragged on by. I was losing my mind a little bit. Frustrated and concerned. Cranky and paranoid. Hating how I had to tell so many people 'still no baby'. Every night I'd cry a little bit because I couldn't handle the waiting. Being pregnant is just emotional. I know it's normal to go over with your first baby and I know the baby is doing just fine staying in there but as much as I know, I couldn't help but be worried... and annoyed. Finally on Sunday I was feeling a little better. I had an appointment for Monday and I had decided not to wait any longer so I was comforted with the thought of just 1 more day. Well today is that day and it's almost over and still, no baby. I got up early and took a nice shower and shaved, I curled my hair cute and put on make-up. I was ready. At my appointment my doctor said unless there is some sort of risk, they won't induce me til Wednesday. I expressed how I was ready now and after checking me he agreed we could go ahead and get me scheduled for Tuesday. I took it. Whatever, one more day.
  So tomorrow I will get a call in the morning (hopefully fairly early) that tells me to come on in and they'll get me started. So today just feels like another boring day of waiting. Around 5:30 I told John we needed to do something special because it's our last night just the two of us. That thought process freaked me out a little. We just went and got dinner and that was nice enough. It's getting really cold out now and being so huge, that was all I was up for doing. But now, writing this, realizing what I am about to go through tomorrow is incredibly overwhelming. I'm feeling inadequate and a little selfish. I can't believe I'm actually doing this. I am going to be a Mom and that's a forever kind of thing. It's remarkable and terrifying. I guess that's all I can say about if for now. I hope I can sleep tonight!
  Oh and just for document purposes, here is me on 12/12/12 at 40 weeks. Not my fave look but everyone says to take a pic to remember... I guess I'll want this image of myself at some point in the future.

2 more weeks and counting

I have a feeling I'm looking more at another 3 weeks. I've made almost no progress but hey, they say that's normal and everything is moving along just as it should. I guess we can only wait and see.

Well I have officially stopped working. I wanted to work right up until but it was getting too hard. Being on my feet and having to bend over to wash hair all the time was just hurting my body too much. I was feeling more useless than useful and I didn't want my girls to have to rely on me when I couldn't hardly do anything anyway. It was harder than I thought it would be to leave. I definitely don't feel ready to completely quit. I just hope I don't get too bored waiting around for this baby to come. I am making to-do check lists and so far I am keeping busy! Although I can't believe it's not December yet!

Anyway, one thing I've been doing a lot of lately that is bringing me joy is lunch dates with friends. It's funny but as I get closer, more of my friends are reaching out and wanting to get together. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love it! I have just felt so blessed and loved lately. I have amazing friends and family. This baby has been so richly spoiled and he doesn't even know it! I can't wait to meet him and show him off to the world. I don't want to get into specifics but I just wanted to say that people are truly amazing and I don't know what I'd do without all the kindness given to me. I don't always feel like I deserve it but I guess that makes me appreciate it and be more grateful. I only hope I can do the same!

Hopefully my next post will be the birth announcing instead of more rambling or complaining of, 'when will this ever end!!!' stay tuned...

6 weeks to go!

Time is drawing closer and I'm going through every emotion.  Excitement, Nervous, Anxious, Scared, Worried, Curious.... you name it!  Mostly I am just impatient I think.  I mean, I'm glad I've still got some time to get things ready, but I am getting more and more ready to not be pregnant anymore!  I can't believe how long it feels.  I'm sure once this kid is here and like a month old I'll think time is flying by so fast.  Plus I keep hearing stories of women who had their babies early and that concerns me a little.  I don't have any reason to suspect that this baby will come any sooner than his due date of 12/12/12.  If he really loves me, he'll come ON his due date and be just the coolest kid ever!  Anyway, I wanted to share a few photos from my baby shower and then from Halloween (I went as a peanut m&m) just to show off the belly.  I don't have any desire to take belly pictures, even if I'm the only one who sees them.  I've been looking at it every day and freezing this appearance in time is not appealing to me.  But here are some just for kicks, I guess.  I had a great shower!  I have the best in-laws ever!!!  They have really spoiled me and continue to spoil me.  I don't know what we would do without them.  It does make me sad that my family isn't here to join in on the fun but I am hoping they will get to meet him soon. Oh and check out my pumpkin this year. Nemo! The pics are a little blurry but you get the idea. I won first place this year too! He's so stinking cute, my favorite part is his fins!!

Being pregnant ain't all bad

This is just a quick little note I wanted to make.  My husband has been studying all day for midterms and it caused an ache in his neck.  So, after working about 6 hours today I somehow found it in me to give him a neck rub to help soothe the pain.  What you need to know is I'm not that great at giving massages.  John isn't that great either and we both secretly wish we had married someone who was naturally gifted in this area.  Anyway, as I was digging in he exclaimed how good it felt and that it was the best massage I've ever given him.  I pondered as to why this might be and came up with what I think is a good assumption.  You see, I have been working less these days because pregnancy is kickin my bum and I just can't run my life in the same way that I'm used to.  My job is physically demanding and I'm constantly using my hands.  But, since I have not being using my hands as much, they must not be as tired as usual, therefore rested hands means better agility and performance.  He got very excited when I told him my theory because to him that means that someday when I'm not working, I'm just home, I will never wear out my muscles so I will always be able to give him a stronger and better massage.  Yeah well, here's hoping!

That Third Trimester

I'm finding it hard to know how to start this but I remember back from my English classes that if you don't know where to start to just write what you're thinking and then you'll get somewhere.  I mean, I know what I want to say, I just don't know how to say it.  I guess I'll just say exactly what I'm feeling.  This pregnancy is starting to wear me out!  I don't think anyone can fully prepare you for what you'll go through and how you'll feel until you go through the experience yourself.  I mean, I love that I'm pregnant and I can feel this amazing little life inside me and all that.  It's just I've started my last trimester and it is kicking my butt so far!  I'm having a hard time looking for something positive between now and when the baby comes.  Everything is just going to get harder and more awkward.  Just to name a few, I'm having a harder time sleeping, driving, working, and getting off the couch.  I've also found my mean streak.  I've heard women talk about how they're mean when they're pregnant and now I understand.  My emotions are taking control.  I got lost running an errand the other day for a friend and I almost burst out crying because I was so frustrated!  And then there's my growing body!  I have gained about 30 pounds already and I still have 11 weeks left to gain!  I'm freaking out a little and definitely not feeling any type of sexy which doesn't help things in the bedroom, and that's a big bummer too!  And then sometimes I laugh so hard I have to run to the bathroom because I'm afraid I'll pee my pants!  Yuck!

Ok I know I am complaining A LOT and I don't sound very happy but I am really happy.  I think I am just really ready not to be pregnant anymore!  I want to meet this little guy and snuggle him and be done with work for a while.  I just can't find anything to look forward to these next 11 weeks.  Don't feel sorry for me, just tell me I can get through this, that time will fly, and I still look great despite the extra weight!  Or remind me that there is still lots to do before baby is here and give me a list to check off, that would be great too!   It's times like these I wish I had my family around.  I know they wish they could be here too.  Sorry for the depressing post but I think it's important to document how you're feeling when you're pregnant, the good along with the bad. 

On the good side, I think we have a name!  I don't want to disclose it yet but if you ask me, I will tell you.  And hopefully my next post will be something happy and exciting!  But I make no promises!

Remodel

For many reasons we decided to remodel part of our house.  Here are some before and after shots.
                     BEFORE                                                                                                                   AFTER

 

 

 

 

So yeah, doesn't even look like the same house since when we first moved in.  Besides the new furniture and some rearranging, everything else is redone!  The yellow walls were painted like 3 years ago and so that doesn't really count for the upgrade but the blue wall is new.  Totally new.  It's drywall that was hung, mudded, and painted and topped off with molding.  Fancy huh?  John wanted that badly because for one, he hated the ugly faux wood and two, it helps drown out the noisy neighbors.  Bonus! 
Then in the kitchen we did all sorts of new stuff.  We built a pantry with broom closet/cat litter box storing.  It isn't totally finished, we still have to build a door for the broom closet.  But shoot it gives us so much more room and bonus, our food isn't out in the open for all to see anymore!
And not to mention there are whole new cabinets doors in the kitchen.  We chucked the old ugly ones and John, with the help of his dad, made completely new doors.  He's amazing.  He also raised our oven and put a floor covering at the bottom to make it look pretty and to level it out (which it needed badly).
We had lots of help from family and friends which made it get done faster and made it so much easier to do!  It took a while to get it this far and there are still some tweekings in store (like touch up paint) that we'll have to get to next break we both have.  We still have more we want to do in the kitchen too.  We want to put a back splash of tile above the counters and then repaint all the green wall that's left to the same blue of the drywall.  We keep saying we want to add on more projects and tackle the upstairs but once this baby is here, I don't know that we'll have time!  I guess we'll see!  But doesn't our house look brighter and happier?  That dark paint was doing us no good!  We at least got this much done in time for baby and it is SO MUCH NICER!!!!  My husband is remarkable and I'm so proud of him and all the hard work he did.  We get to admire it everyday now!  My house just became way more livable!!!

3 Happenings Lately

#1  My family had a small reunion the first week in August.  We went to Park City and stayed a few nights in other people's condos that we rented.  We had a nice time just hanging out, relaxing, eating, and swimming.  I was the lucky one who didn't have far to travel which I appreciated because driving too long makes me uncomfortable these days.  My family came from South Carolina, Texas, Arizona, Nevada, and California.  It was so nice to see my nieces and nephews and everyone.  We had a little bit of bad fortune sadly.  My husband got sick and missed out on almost everything and my brother-in-law had to fly home after just one day because his brother passed away.  Regardless, we made the most of our time together and before I knew it, we were all headed our separate ways again.  I hate living far away from everyone.  I hope someday soon we can all live within doable driving distances.  On another downer note, I was a bum and didn't take any pictures.  Hopefully my Mom can upload hers and we'll still have some documentation of our trip.  It was so nice to be all together, I can't believe how fast time went.

#2  My handsome and still very young husband turned 31 recently and compared to last year,
http://shearjade.blogspot.com/2011/08/johns-30th-birthday-part-1.html
http://shearjade.blogspot.com/2011/08/johns-30th-birthday-part-2.html
this year was pretty pathetic.  He didn't want any money spent on him and not much of an activity this year either.  I am such a party animal (I think I get that from my parents) that it blows my mind that he doesn't want to do something fun.  I usually make him anyway!  I decided to work on his actual birthday because of work circumstances and instead celebrate the next day.  So, on John's birthday he pretty much did nothing all day.  He drove back to Park City to pick up some things that got left behind and read some books at Barnes and Noble.  Then he played video games, watched TV and played basketball.  Typical day really.  So I made some plans of things to do together the next day and instead we got busy starting our remodel up again.  Around 4 we called it a day and decided to go get some dinner with a few friends.  John wanted Indian food (which I don't care for but will support for special occasions) so we went to the Bombay House in Provo.  We had a nice time and that was pretty much that.  Definitely not as awesome as last year but John is happy and that's all that matters!

 #3  You may be wondering if I got John a present for his birthday.  Well, sorta.  All summer I've been complaining about how hot it is and how I can never get cold enough and how I hate sweating after getting out of the shower.  Blow drying my freaking long hair was getting so annoying.  So, I decided it was time to go short!  I wanted to wait til his birthday because that way I could make my cut his gift and I wouldn't be spending any money on him.  It may seem like a cheap gift but hey, I wouldn't be complaining about it anymore and I know he really wanted that!  All summer he has been excited and ready for me to do it.  I would come home from work time and time again and if I mentioned I had any news, he'd run down the stairs to see if I'd chopped my hair yet.  He kept telling me not to wait!  He likes it long, don't get me wrong.  He says he just likes me to like it.  So, the big question was, how short?  I decided I could donate it so I'd have to do at least 10 inches.  I was not afraid to go short.  Hello!  I've had short hair most of my life and let's face it, I just am a short-haired kind of girl.  So, thankfully I was smart enough this time to take some pictures.

BEFORE:

 

AFTER:

So, what do you think?  I went a little shorter after the first cut.  I didn't realize I had so much!  I love it short and so far haven't missed the long hair one bit!  I can't believe I waited so long to do this!  I even think I'll go shorter, eventually.  Maybe add some fun colors too.  I can't decide.  It's a whole new canvas with lots of possibilities so stay tuned, exciting things may be coming.... to my hair....!!!

Well that's what's been going on lately.  The baby is still doing well and growing every day!  Less than 4 months to go!